Arran’s Lament

New Song!

[Arran wrote this poem and I made it into a song without his permission then I showed it to him]

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Arran’s Lament
Instant coffee tastes like shit
I do not see the point of it.
A total bloody fucken farce
That makes your breath smell like dog’s arse.

Penis Time

New Song!

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Penis Time
Penis time, yes it’s Penis Time
Let me check my watch, oh it’s Penis Time
Hang on, what’s that say on the VCR?
Oh, it’s Penis Time (coz that is the clock)
Yes, but wait a mo’
Let me call the time up on the telephoney
And the man on there says that it’s Penis Time

Traffic

New Song!

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Traffic
Look at the cars driving past
They’re all silver, white or red or dark blue
Buy a better coloured car or fuck you

Eat Chips

New Song!

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Eat Chips
Eat chips, they’re made of taters
Eat chips, they’re salty too
Eat chips, they come in flavours
Chicken and barbeque
I love Jesus
I love Jesus-zuz
Zuz, zuz, zuz

Bunny Rabbits

New Song!

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Bunny Rabbits
Bunny rabbits hopping around
Always never making a sound
Everyone likes them, nobody hates them
Except for fucking farmers
And people like those guys
So fuck off you fucking farmers
Your hats fucking piss me off

David’s Jeans

New Song!

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David’s Jeans
David’s jeans got ripped
Coz of some fuckwit
Parked his ute too close, leaving little room
David squeezed through the tiny gap he left
Cock against the ute, wall against his cleft
And he got his jeans caught on metal beams
Tore a little hole
What a rigmarole

Fight in a War

New Song!

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Fight in a War
Fight, fight in a war
Fight for your life
Fight for your freedom all day