I’m an Absolute Professional

July 26, 2016

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I’m an absolute professional
You should see my credentials
I’m an absolute professional
You should see my credentials


Man O Man

July 12, 2016

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Man O Man O Kazakhstan
My Nan likes flan, my Gran likes bran
Stan – a man – bought bran for Nan
But Gran’s the bran fan, man
Oh Stan, Oh Gran
Bran fan


Inside my Panties

July 3, 2016

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It’s time to do a little poo
Inside my panties
I’ll get a spoon, the finest spoon
And clean out those panties
Oh, oh, what a treat to take home
A teaspoon of the poo I just done
Time to do a little poo
Every day of my life

This song is plagiarised… I woke up to my upstairs neighbour playing some song using these chords and melody which I started singing rude words to, then it was funny so I spent an hour making it into a Tootleg Boy song while I ate Uncle Toby’s meusli. Unfortunately I couldn’t emulate the Bowie/new romantic voice I imagined it in.

If you recognise the tune of the first eight bars please tell me!


Takin’ the Time

June 11, 2016

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Hello
Hello there believers, please be seated in God’s house
Takin’ the time to praise Jesus
Takin’ the time to praise God
Open up your B-books to a bit that’s really grouse
Takin’ the time to love Jesus
Takin’ the time to praise Him
Lift your voice up
Take a deep breath and sing “Hallelujah”
Open your gob and cry “Hallelujah Boo-yah!”
Dames, guys Heaven
FM7
G sus 4 us all
Here’s A minor for you
C men pray on them
Pray with them, pray for them


Fnurp

June 10, 2016

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Fnurp
Fnurp
Fnurp
Fnurp
Fnurp fnurp
Fnurp fnurp fnurp
Fnurp fnurp fnurp fnurp
Fnurp fnurp fnurp fnurp
Fnurp fnurp fnurp fnurp
Fnurp fnurp fnurp fnurp
Fnurpy-Fnurpins
Fnurp fnurp fnurp
Fnurp


I am a Fucken Motherfucker

May 28, 2016

Donwlaod!

I am a fucken motherfucker
I am a motherfucking cunt
Holy motherfucker
Roly motherfucker
Poly motherfucker
Angelina Jolie motherfucker


I Loove Joozuz

May 28, 2016

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I love Joozuz