Candle in the Wind

May 31, 2011

Candle in the Wind
Goodbye English Rose
May you ever grow in our hearts
You are really dead, really dead
Boo-hoo boo-hoo
You are really dead, really dead
Boo-hoo boo-hoo
You were the grace that placed itself
Doo-bit be doo doo-bit be doo dooby-doo
Placed itself where lives were f*cked up
You whispered to those with owchies
Now you’re dead the stars spell your name


I Like Pine Plantations

May 30, 2011

I do quite like pine plantations
Even though they are not natural in the Australian environment
They grow in neat rows
On some hilltops
And their leaves are dumb
Actually, they don’t even have leaves.

Help me Find my Bra

May 29, 2011

Help Me Find My Bra

Listen up my homie brothers, listen to me
I have lost my favourite bra
la la la la la la la la
It was a lacy bra
Help me find my bra

Yum Yum

May 28, 2011

Poo poo bum bum wee wee f*ck fart
I like buying food at K-Mart
Sh*t sh*t f*ck f*ck ass ass bum hole
Eating food is good for your soul
Buns and meat and big, red frankfurts
Salty mayo, give me ten spurts
Pack my fudge and let me eat it
Come on, come on, come on let’s eat!


May 27, 2011
Try a finger up your arsehole
Try a pinkie up the butt


May 26, 2011

Don’t eat jalapeños if you want a good sleep
You shall dream of needing to shit real bad
And then when you wake you realise it’s true
Don’t eat jalapaeños
Do not eat jalapeños before sleep


May 25, 2011

Jesus is coming
Are you saved?
La la la la etc.
Are you going to Hell?

Note: This song was made in 2003 but is currently relevant because just the other day somebody thought the rapture was going to happen and it was all in the news and God, why am I even saying this, how boring.