I Am A Postman

March 31, 2012

[audio http://hutcho.dreamhosters.com/TB/12KK/20_I%20Am%20A%20Postman.mp3]
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I Am A Postman
I am a postman, I will bring your post post post post
I am a postman, I will bring your mail
I am a postman, I will bring your post post post post
I will bring your post then I will run away
I will bring your post then I will run away

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Seven Man

March 30, 2012


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Seven Man
There was a man with seven butts
Woke up each day with seven futts
One from each of his seven butts
Seven butts
Got out of bed, did seven shits
Used toilet paper, seven bits
Flushed his toilet seven times
Then he ate several bits of toast
Yum


Just One Thumb

March 29, 2012


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Just One Thumb
Just one thumb
Is what I can put in my bum
One little thumb, my only chum
Try a second, it won’t fit
I have tried it
Just you try to squeeze two thumbs in my browneye
Try as you might but you will cry
Cry because you hate to fail
Mum always said you’d never be the best at anything
And looks like she was right


Try A Little Tenderness

March 28, 2012

Here’s a repost of this great, great song.

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Try a Little Tenderness
Try a little tenderness
Show her you’re a tender soul
Try a little tenderness
So she forgets you’re an arsehole
Don’t just stuff your bollocks in her earhole in the morning sun
Don’t just take her running just to show her that you have the runs
Don’t make reservations at a hotel made for fat, gay men
Asking her to have a shave so you can pretend she’s female


What About My Anus?

March 27, 2012


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What About My Anus?
What about
What about
What about my anus?
It’s pretty rad
Don’t you, don’t you think?
Just had to check
As you were my friend
As you were my friend


Ant Poison

March 26, 2012


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Ant Poison
Come on little ants
Eat all that shit up
Take it back to your nest
Make all your friends die
Come on little ants
Suck my poison trap
Eat all the deadly food
Feed it to the ones you love
Die you bastards die you bastards
Die you bastards die you bastards
Die die
They feed upon my poison
Die die
They sup the nectar of doom
You have betrayed your entire nest
You have betrayed your entire nest
You have betrayed your entire nest
I am the best you betrayed your nest


Knock Knock

March 25, 2012


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Knock Knock
Knock knock
Someone’s there
Knock knock
Someone’s at the door
It’s me, it’s your friend
Won’t you open up for me?
I would but as you know it’s sort of strange to come around
At midnight when we met not even half an hour ago
Yeah yeah yeah i have heard it all before
Stop mucking ’round and open up the door
I’ll call the cops
You’d better not do that
Why fuckin’ not?
Just open this door
Ho ho the cops are here
Ho ho the cops are here
Ho ho the cops are here
Oh no the cops are here
(repeat til fade)