I Know Some Becs

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I Know Some Becs
In this old life
I know some Becs
That is to say
Girls called Rebecca
I know a Bec
Bec Delatorre
I also know
Rebecca Clements
Oh yes, I know some Becs

The Right Stuff

New Song!

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The Right Stuff
The right stuff
I got that shit in spades
The right stuff
I me myself have spades of that shit
The right stuff
This person posesses spades of
The right stuff
I me me yours truly once got spades full of
The right stuffies
stuffy stuffy stuffy

Lick My Nipsy

New Song!

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Lick My Nipsy
Lick my nipsy
Lick my nipsy
Lick my nipsy
Lick my nipsy

Mad Max

New Song!

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Mad Max
Mad Max, Mad Max
His wife played sad sax
He gives outlaws bad backs
Mad Max, yo
Mad Max, Mad Max
The bad girls had rad racks
He wears such bad blacks
Mad Max, yo

We Talk About Such Rude Things

New Song!

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We Talk About Such Rude Things
Oh boy, we talk about such rude things
It’s not like me to point out such banalities, but we just talk about fucking
Maybe it’s too early coz it makes me feel a little sad

What’s the Deal

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What’s the Deal
What’s the deal with stuff ‘n’ shit?
Should I stand or should I sit?
Look around, so what’s the deal?
They all stand but I’ll just kneel

Lets Only Say Hey

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Lets Only Say Hey
Gosh you look sad when I see you at Ray’s
I’ll be there most days
So just for now how about we just say “Hey”
And then walk away
Maybe soon we will be feeling OK
That would be cool, hey

Swan of Creation

New Song!

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“Swan of Creation” copyright 1974 Grace Soarinfree

Swan of Creation
Swan of Creation
It will be all
Swan of Creation
And the moon so
Swan of Creation
Watch me do a
Swan of Cre-Swan of Cre-Swan of
Swan of Cre-Swan of Cre-Swan-Swan

I Never Knew

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I Never Knew
All praise to God
Righteous men know how fun it is
To drink an egg flip made with jizz
And with egg
But with just a bit of spunky in it
From my nuts, yo

That’s Enough Fan Art

New Song!

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That’s Enough Fan Art
That’s enough fan art
Now make something new
It’s much harder to do, and hard to sell

Geek Culture

New Song!

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Geek Culture
It’s not culture
It’s just t-shirts
All containing repetitive in-jokes
Just about some show
Or some movie reference

Ice Cubes

New Song!

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Ice Cubes
Put ice cubes uppa my ass
Use your thumb and tell me what you felt
Inside my rectum while they was a-meltin’
Yeah

It Takes Two to Tango

New Song!

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It Takes Two to Tango
It takes two to tango
Go and eat a mango
Go and eat a shit
If you don’t like it
Dancing is a gas a-chugga-chugga-chugga-chugga
Go and kiss my ass a-chugga-chugga-chugga-chugga
(repeat til fade)

You’ve Never Read Comics

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You’ve Never Read Comics
You have piercings and coloured hair
Nice one – you don’t like comics
You go to gigs and write for music papers
Nice one – you don’t like comics
Don’t you understand anything?
Proper cool people know about comics
It’s sort of 101
It’s sort of 101

Don’t Say “‘Slaw”

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Don’t Say “‘Slaw”
Who invented that abbrevio?
It sounds ugly and it doesn’t sound cute
Don’t use the word ‘slaw no more
It’s not as good as just coleslaw

Proposition

New Song!

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Proposition
I have some business for you
It pays so well, it pays in gold bullion
If you’d like to take the job
Do a poo
Do a poo
Do a poo
So I can ascertain thy worth as a fuck, fuck, fuck, fuckin’ human being
Wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee

Dippin Bread in Dip

New Song!

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Quantified
Dippin’ bread in hommus I’m a-dippin’ bits of bread
Dippin’ bread in hommus and I’ve got some tuna spread
Got meself some capers but they are a little gross
Think I’ll stick to hommus coz I like that one the most

Electric Brown

New Song!

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Electric Brown
Oo baby I do electric poo baby
Oo baby oo babe electric poo
Oo mama oo mum electric poo mama
Out of my bum comes electric poo mama
Put a little bit on me lip
Put on me lip a bit of shit
Makes my air go like Art Garfunkel
Standing up like a catholic uncle
I can run a small watch off it
I can light a small light with it
I can run a radio with it
I can heat a coffee with it

Floggin’ in the Boggin’

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Floggin’ in the Boggin’
Floggin’ me log in the bog
Is really fun ’til somebody walks in
Oh my!

I Can’t Dress Myself

New Song!

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I Can’t Dress Myself
It’s all so cold coz this is a crazy winter
I never remember to put enough warm layers on
So when the nighttime comes, I start shivering
I can’t see that far ahead first thing in the morning
Looks like my Mum was right to always think that I’d be cold
Why think I can dress myself just because I’m this old?

I Like You Like a Crumb

New Song!

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I Like You Like a Crumb
I like you, I like you, I like you like a crumb
A crumb on your face that you don’t know about
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Yeyeeueueyeuyiuueyeueiyeiueyee

Flexing my Muscles

New Song!

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Flexing my Muscles
Flexing my muscles
Flexing my muscles
So all the ladies can see them, see them
All the ladies can know who’s boss boss
I win at life, all the ladies know
I am not some so-and-so
I’m built for action – that’s appaz
Flexing my muscles pays off

NUUUUUUH

New Song!

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NUUUUUUH
Nuuh duuh duuh duuh duuh poo poo poo poo fuck
Wee wee nuuh nuuh me am a dumb, dumb person
Stupid

Make Me a Sandwich

New Song!

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Make Me a Sandwich
Make me a sandwich please
Make it with bread and one slice of cheese
Put some tomato on
That should be pretty good

Penis Paradisio

New Song!

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Penis Paradisio
Penis
Woah

What’s On Your Mind

New Song!

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What’s On Your Mind
What’s on your mind?
What’s on your noggin?
What’s on your brain?
What thoughts you thinkin’?
You wanna know what’s on my nog-nog
Well, here you go
Here’s what I’m thinkin’
I was thinking while you asked that I just did a wee
On your leg when you weren’t looking he he he he he

Roving Balls

New Song!

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Roving Balls
I feel in my heart that you move around too much
One sec you’re there, then you disappear somewhere
Why are you up there when you should be down in my crotch?
Oh my gypsy balls shall you ever rest a spell
Oh my gypsy balls shall you ever rest a spell

Fishy Bits

New Song!

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Fishy Bits
My shit tastes like fish cakes
My piss tastes like grilled flake
My minge if I had one, would smell like a bad one
My balls taste of fish paste
My dick feels like Japanese eel

My Hands

New Song!

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My Hands
Put your hands upon my shoulders
Put your hands upon my dick
Put your hands upon my anus hole
Put your hands upon my sushi roll

Watch Your Tits There, Love

New Song!

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Watch Your Tits There, Love
Watch your tits there, love
Watch your tits there, love
Watch your tits there, love
Watch your tits there, love
Watch your boobs, your two boobs
Watch your boobs, your two boobs
Watch your tits, love

Let Me Run My Mouth Off

New Song!

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Let Me Run My Mouth Off
I don’t mean everything I say
I’m an artist god dammit
I don’t know shit